If you have read anything I have written before, you may know I am a strong believer in saying yes.
Yes, to trying new things.
Yes, to meeting new people.
Yes, to opportunities that sound slightly terrifying at first but somehow become part of your personality a semester later.
The best memories of my university experience have come from saying yes before I felt completely ready.
But somewhere between wanted to do everything I started noticing something.
Saying yes is powerful.
Saying yes to everything is exhausting.
And at time, I started hoping my to-do list looks like this more often.
Inspirational. Balanced. Possibly the best gift you can give to yourself.
So here are some notes from a professional yes-sayer who is slowly, reluctantly, dramatically learning that “no” is not, in fact, a going to take professional yes-sayer badge away.
Note 1: Not every good opportunity is your opportunity
University is full of good things.
There are events to attend, clubs to join, workshops to register for, roles to apply for, people to meet and emails that somehow all sound urgent.
The confusing part is that most of these things are genuinely useful. That is what makes it hard.
But just because something is good does not mean it has to fit into your week.
Sometimes the opportunity is great, the timing is not, and even your calendar knows you cannot be in three places at once.
Note 2: Future-you is not a superhero
I have made many plans on behalf of future-me.
Future-me will finish the assignment.
Future-me will wake up early.
Future-me will go to every class, work, socialise, take on “just one more thing,” and still not be completely burnt out by the end of the day.
Very ambitious of her.
The problem is that future-you is still you. Probably tired. Probably needing a guilt free afternoon nap . Probably wondering why past-you agreed to so much.
Saying no sometimes is just being kinder to the version of yourself who has to handle the schedule later.
Note 3: Saying no doesn’t mean you’re missing out
This was the hardest one for me to accept.
For a long time, saying no felt like losing something: a connection, an experience, an opportunity, a chance to be involved.
But sometimes saying no to one thing means saying yes to something else.
Yes to rest.
Yes to study.
Yes to calling home.
Yes to actually enjoying the things you already said yes to.
Making the most of uni does not mean doing everything. It means choosing what matters and having enough energy left to show up properly.
Reminder
I still believe in saying yes, and honestly, I probably always will.
Say yes to the things that excite you and make campus feel like yours. But your yes means so much more when it is not running on guilt, pressure or purely vibes.
And if the “no’s” start piling up because life itself starts getting overwhelming with study, work, money, family, health, everything at once – you do not have to figure it out alone.
La Trobe’s Health and Wellbeing services can help find support, including counselling and mental health support, Student Wellbeing Connect, accessibility support, financial counselling, multifaith spiritual wellbeing, LGBTIQA+ support, Men’s Health and Wellbeing, and First Nations student support.
You do not even need to know exactly where to start. Student Wellbeing Connect can help point you in the right direction.
Asking for help early is not failing at balance. Sometimes, it is literally how you find it.
So consider this your very unofficial KitKat-style reminder: have the break, take the pause, protect your energy.
A professional yes-sayer is still allowed to say no at times!